Every time I turn on my computer after my boy is on it I seemingly am in for a surprise.

One time my boy minimized my start menu and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out how to get to the "it is now safe to turn your computer off" sign before shutting down.

A very small change threw me totally for a loop.

I was quite surprised when I found the link to the program "Sizzle" on my computer asking me if I was over 18 and wanted to contact a "toll free number" where I would pay several dollars a minute to be engaged in sizzling sexual conversation.

I guess as the father of a 13-year-old I shouldn’t have been too surprised.

My son, when I asked, insisted he had no control over what happened; the computer made him do it (against his will.)

It must have been a strange computer virus, which I have dubbed the "love bug."

I was reassured when he told me the program downloaded itself without his volition and that he wasn’t interested in seeing nude women.

Thinking about how my hormones raged (and rage) I could understand him not having any control over it.

I remembered too that when my brother turned 13, my dad offered him a subscription to Playboy.

I found myself offering my son a subscription to Playboy (which he declined) and telling him it was ok to chat with his friends online about sex, not to strangers and to be careful in cyberland.

A New Age way to look at "safe sex".

The "Just Say No" advice of Nancy Reagan seemed inappropriate to the situation.

When was it ever appropriate ?

The morning after this experience I slept in leaving my wife to get my kids off for school.

I awoke in time to discover my daughter had left her lunch box at home.

Since I was taking my son to school anyway and planning to drop off my wife’s car for an oil change, my wife asked why not drop off the lunch box my daughter had forgotten on the way to the auto place before it opened.

Seemed logical enough at the time.

Since it was freezing outside I had my son start up the car to defrost the window.

When I drove past the car dealer on the way to my daughter’s school and saw the owner opening up I began to see the flaw in the logic.

I was pleased though that seemingly this was an example of something I did better with my kids than my wife as I never let my daughter leave home without her lunch.

I didn’t mind telling the story of the lunch box to the assistant principal at my daughter’s school who used to work with my wife many years ago.

I kept until now the story of the "sizzle" to myself.

When I arrived at the car repair place I was surprised to see that my wife still was not there.

The owner said my wife called to say she would be happy to be there if she had the keys to her car.

I had taken her car key when I had my son start up her car.

My keys were in the pants pocket I was wearing.

The start of my workday was delayed by the lunch box and keys fiascoes.

Long enough for me to enjoy the words to the Neil Young song Silver and Gold from the CD that I had recently bought…

"I don’t care if the sun don’t shine,

And the rain keeps pouring down on me and mine.

Cause our kind of love never seems to get old,

It’s better than Silver and Gold."

As I thought about the crazy morning I had created for myself, I was pleased to have the love of my wife and partner to help me through the days and nights of "Sizzle" and lunchboxes.

I wish for my son to be as lucky.

My wife still looks good to me, Nice curves.